“Hello” I said in a sleepy voice. I was sleeping
“So rahe ho, class nahi hai kya ?? “
“Hai na 2:20 se “ I simultaneously glanced at watch …2:10… ‘O fuck’ I almost said it but instead I said “OK got it tada” (see I can be gentleman sometimes)
You might be wondering its’ still 10 minutes to class na !!!! Well welcome to daddu’s class (earlier known as chacha ). He has given us two options which in his words are-‘either don’t come late to class or don’t come, there is no third options’.
I jumped off my bed, my roomie was already gone (with waking me up… bitch he is ) Don’t know what has happened to him of late, he has been meditating ,following 12-6 am sleeping routine. God never knew V-loss can sometime trigger mental disorder called ‘mokshya ki prapti’!!!. Forget it.
1 minute is what it took to get myself ready. Now tough task: find the the keys both room’s and cycle’s. You know I have a bad habit of keeping things (right from lappy, novels, magazines, newspaper, books, bags, headphone, specs, purse, clothes, coffee mug, pens, KEYS, and god knows what ) on my bed. Not my fault its’ in my genes. I am a Y chromosome holder …. So … so blame god. And BTW you are supposed to keep your better half on the latter half of you bed and for the time being they are my better halves. So I am only being a responsible guy. :P
Anyhow I couldn’t find my cycle key ring and only 5 minutes left for the class so
‘RUN FORREST RUN’
Finally I made it (my ride was already there in the stand … see ‘chutiyon ki kami nahi hai’ ) I joined backbenchers in the 2nd column, my usual besides Chattu Dash (Mistake 1) took out the novel and got busy (Mistake 2). I forgot to do FIRST THING FIRST (taking out a copy and writing a page of relevant topic ) and so did the rest of my bench mates (Mistake 3)
It was Daddu’s back to back 2 lectures. Everything went on well till only 15 minutes were left, when one last bench guys got caught doing what I don’t know but yes stupid enough for that. When asked to show notes he went blank when asked get out of the class he was constantly blaring ‘sorry’ irritating daddu enough to get him on his nerves.
[Golden rule: never get caught in a stupid act rest you can’t help neither can god at that time]
Well this was the beginning. He asked whole of the last benchers to show him the notes.
‘mare gaye…’I spoke moving my head towards chattu, he was gone. Rather he was down sitting beneath the desk. ’Bitch …. Ostrich‘
“Why are you not coming “daddu was getting furious.
“Coming sir …..saalon koi to copy do” adding to misery my sandal was gone …thrown out of window “B#$@%$#^&@ meri hi g**d mili thi marne ke liye” I slipped in someone else slipper and took chattu’s copy who was still down but not out. I walked down stairs and handed him the copy god knows what was written in it.
“Sir 523 vivek kumar … I have not written “He looked in to me eye to eye, I said nothing, no sorry either.
He put a dot mark in front of my name. He ordered me to get out and for the rest of class –‘all of you show me your copy’(mistake rectification 1). I sighed ‘chalo main akela to nahi hoon’ relief. Surprised!!! , don’t be. Well they are my friends so how can I think of saving their ass while mine has been fucked publically in a hardcore way. In the end as many as 20 got the same fate, of course chattu was there. Rest survived.
Outside the biggest question on everyone face was ‘Ab kya karoge?’. My answer to this was “ab main kya karoonga, usne pakda hai uski tension”. See attitude matters
Still there are some guys ‘jinki g**d main chulla hota hai’, they went to him for apology and return he ordered us to show him up to date notes along with apology letter (which must carry parents phone number )
‘saale ye log maa- baap pe kyun pahoch jaate hain aapas main matter solve nahi kar sakte’
Anyways : ‘jabadasti ka’ mistake retification 2 – I woke up whole night to complete the notes.
Next day before entering his office chamber I rang home to use my first lifeline (mistake rectification 3) “mummy actually ek prob ho gayi …. Agar kisi prof ka call aye to matter sambhal lena”
“kyun abhi kya kar diya !!!!” I am sure might have expected much worse. I quickly explained her.
“bas itna bolna ki aage se galti nahi karega” I hung up
Later inside daddu on seeing my letter said – “land line no do ...not mobile no “
“are sir land line nahi hai. Gahr ka no hai aap baat kar lo “
“kk fine “ he umarked my name with red tick mark and kept the letter in his file.
PS: My first lifeline went waste (he never called not until now) and the worst thing I had to explain everything to mum :(
